Commandment 13-A, Date1 Update

Date1. After about 6 dates I am noticing a disturbing trend, Date1 continues to violate Commandment 13-A, thou shalt not whine compulsively about thy weight.

First, Date1, IHMO, needs to gain, not lose weight. But everyone has their own body image. Certainly I can understant the frustration of trying to accomplish something but not being able to do so. I can even understand occasional whines about weight but this has become persistent and matastisizes in every conversation. I did ask if there was a weight problem before, sometimes people overweight in their youth carry a negative body image around even after the weight loss. This was not the case.

Even at our last dinner, Date1 was continually whining. I wanted to say something like "Well, maybe you should put down that third mohito, I would imagine each one is about 500 calories. Oh and the flank steak in cheese sauce is not really a good dieting option." Instead I just ate my chicken and drank my water. "I'm sorry", was all I could muster, for the millionth time. Whining and not doing anything about it, this has to end.

I had a brief stint after Spring semester where I went on a food and drink binge, a big one. Also during this time I could not be bothered with working out or yoga; arm curls and triangle pose don't go so well when you have a vodka tonic in your hand. Hey, I deserved it after taking 20 hours of all science classes! About a week later I noticed one morning that I was not able to fit comfortably into my favorite khaki cargos. Uh oh. Wrong fitting clothes is my only impetus for getting on a scale. 164, yikes, I gained 9 pounds from that episode. Smiling, and it was totally worth it!

So, I dig back into my closet for the fat boy shorts, head out to the grocery. Salad stuff, chicken breasts, fruit and as God as my witness I'll never drink again (ok, at least for two weeks :) I know I can lose 2 pounds a week if I eat smaller sensible meals, go back to working out and stop drinking. OK, destination 155, in about a month. Fast forward 4 weeks, hey, I'm 155 again! Done.

So, I relay this story to Date1, its meant as inspiration not a personal attack.

"YOU DONT UNDERSTAND!", inside voice becoming a little hysterical.

I'm thinking: Correct, I don't understand, furthermore, I dont want to!

More hysteria, "IM UNDER INCREDIBLE PRESSURE FROM FRIENDS TO BE THIN!!"

I'm thinking: Find new friends, maybe some that aren't superficial high school girls?

I've abandoned the nice and subtle approach for ending things. Some people may claim I've never been nice nor subtle in this capacity, I won't argue, but I find that technique is not effective. I'm also not cheesy enough to do the no response treatment, I'm an adult not a 12 year old girl. So, I just told Date1 this was not working; after 6 dates all I knew was that there is the perception of a weight problem in addition to a year in Sao Paulo during high school and graduate studies in International Finance.

Call me when you can navigate beyond this very small bump in the road.

Honestly I think dating is highly overrated but it is entertaining and at the very least you get to know something about yourself; likes, dislikes, your own fabulously dysfunctional personality quirks, what boundaries exist or don't. I guess this I why I keep saying things like - "Sure that sounds like fun, I'll see you Friday" when I really should be saying - "No, I'm too busy and I'm not really interested in dating".

Now enter Date3 from Cafe Brazil.

After I get over this cold I will have more details.